July 15th 2020

07152020

Captains Log 07152020… wait, I’m not even sure how that goes. I watched Star Trek for a brief period during my college years when I lived with my Aunt and her family but I don’t remember much. I was a fan though. Just not a loyal fan, I guess.

Anyway, I don’t have a lot to write about today. A few topics have been swirling around in my head but none of them are grabbing me.

  1. Wide pants from eshacti. It’s time to kick Stitch Fix.
  2. Bug cooking dinner. Her old soul demeanor humbles me.
  3. Learning to like sparkling water.
  4. Puppuccinos for the dogs in the mornings at the nearby Starbucks. Did you know having a Starbucks within walking distance of your house can increase your house’s value? I had no idea. Fun tip from my morning talks with my Dad.
  5. My mom’s amazing weight loss journey and how we are writing a book about it. Not really, we’re just writing a notebook with tips and tricks. We just need a nutritionist and we could take this on the road. Kidding. Sort of.
  6. My love affair with Belle Robertson, author of Tired of Thinking About Drinking (especially the “okay, goodbyeeeeee!” one minute messages).
  7. CAMPING! We are leaving soon and of course I have typed up a massive list of things to pack.
  8. What if they don’t let us camp because of covid? So far so good.
  9. Garden News (we took a blow from the powdery mold monster), new nylon bags and how not to plant your plants too close together next year so your cucumbers don’t taste like squash and your squash doesn’t taste like cucumber.
  10. Sewing plans.
  11. My new characters Bandit and Su. I actually already wrote about them over here.
  12. Pulling from the Brenda’s Book of proverbs, life lessons, criticisms and hard knocks.
  13. Out in my shed looking at old journals. So many!
  14. Monday Morning Disease, 6 o’clock drink o’clock, Morning Mantras, Cold Showers and other tricks

What do you got? Anything you’d like me to wax on about now that I’m in the habit writing every morning? No promises though. You know me. This could just be a phase that could dry up tomorrow for all I know.

We leave tomorrow for our long-awaited camping trip and I’m NOT taking my computer with me. I know. Such self-control, right? Heh. I will be instagramming whenever I find wifi of course. I’ll be up at the general store standing in that one corner that has cell coverage with my mask on, six-feet away from all the other wifi-seeking city-slickers.

If any local thieves are reading this I just want you to know that my house is heavily alarmed, fully camera-ed up AND I am having someone check in on my cat who is a Krav Maga master.

Love you guys!

My Crazy DIY Cake-Lady Hat

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I have to quickly get this up (even though I have a million and five things to do today before my crazy spooky Halloween dessert party tonight) BECAUSE there might be somebody just as crazy as me who wants to make a cake hat for their Halloween costume!  Do it! Because it’s fun! Especially if you are like me and you like to play around with cardboard and a glue gun but then again, if you are like me and like to play around with cardboard and a glue gun, you probably don’t need a stupid flippin’ tutorial. I never follow tutorials. I just skim ahead and pay attention to the parts I have questions about. So feel free to skim along!

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First you need a big piece of cardboard. I recommend an amazon shopping prime account and an addiction to getting packages at your front door. It highly compliments a hobby in cardboard whispering. I used a big box about, I don’t know 14×18″ maybe?  Here are the measurements you’ll really care about: (Aren’t you proud of me for actually writing them down?)

  • 3 circles: 8″, 5″ and 2.5″
  • 3 rings: 14″, 8″ and 5″
  • 3 strips: 25″ x 8″, 15.5″ x 4.5″ and 9″ x 3.5″

These are give or take a half inch here and there. You can always trim to fit when you are assembling. But if you start with these sizes you’ll be good to go and will have a little extra.

Tools you will need:

  • a glue gun (duh) and plenty of hot glue sticks
  • a box cutter or exacto knife (preferably with a fresh blade)
  • a metal ruler
  • a self-healing mat or cutting board (don’t be like me and accidentally cut off your mat board and knick your table. Good thing our table is old and Payam loves me.)
  • spray paint
  • notions for decorating (I used ric-rack, pom poms, fake flowers and a bird but you could use anything really.)

Let’s do it!

After you’ve cut all your pieces you need to score your long strips. These are going to bend around in a circle to become  the round cake sides of your hat. The scoring assists in the bending. First score them once long ways. Where to score them depends on how high you like your cake sides to be. I made mine 4 inches high on the first tier and I think 3 and 2 inches high on the second and third, respectively. (I used an existing bend from my box but if you don’t have one just use the backside of your blade to create a very light cut along the top layer of the cardboard that will let it fold on that spot.)

Then you’ll need to cut narrow strips on one side of the long score line about an inch apart to create your tabs that attach to the rings. On the other side of the long score take that score line but turn it into a score instead instead. The cut strips are going to be the tabs that attach to the round ring brims of your hats the un-cut score lines are going to be the round sides of the cake. I know, this probably makes no sense. Just look at the pictures and if it still doesn’t make sense, email me.

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So you see the long strips roll up into the hat sides and the tabs fold up under the rings in a flare. Glue those tabs down to the rings. Repeat for each tier of your cake (I went from larger to smaller).

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In between the tiers that my head didn’t go through (the top two) I glued an extra disc (included in the above measurements) to make it easier to affix layer to layer. Then I attached the smallest circle to the top of the cake. Tah-dah! It’s a pretty sturdy cake once it’s all affixed and glued. I did cut my lower tier at an angle to be topsy turvy but I’ll leave that to the experts to figure out.

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Then I spray painted the whole thing with some chocolate brown spray paint and the underside with a quick coat of purple for added interest (not shown above).

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I glued on my ric-rack around the cake edges to look like fancy icing and then glued on some fake flowers for decoration.

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I searched around my whole house for an old black crow bird to put on top of the cake for that extra haunted touch but I think the cat got it an carried it under the bed or something because I couldn’t find it anywhere. My second choice was this mangled white bird left over from that year I decorated the Christmas tree with fake birds but it’s all gross too because the golden retriever got it. But whatever, it works! It’s a great way to recycle old things that maybe I otherwise should have thrown out.

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Then we put on our costumes and got ready for the Halloween dance at school. Leftover backdrops from Wonder Woman shoots work great for Halloween photo backdrops.

angle-joon

Joon was an angel, naturally. Bug was supposed to be a devil (I even bought her a red leotard and a pitch fork and devil horns and I was all excited to paint her rain boots red and glue tissue paper flames to them) but she got another bee up her butt and decided she wanted to be a deer princess instead.

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That’s my girl. Deer in the headlights pose was her brilliant idea. She has such a wicked sense of humor.

So Happy Halloween! I know it’s probably too late but if you are a last minute crazy crafting queen like me, may the winds of the glue gun goddess be with you!