• 15 minute posts,  I'm an idiot,  illos,  Life Lessons,  the dogs

    The Great Duck Rescue Face-plant

    Monday, I was walking my dogs and there was a malard duck in the middle of the street. It’s a pretty busy street so I was worried about the duck. But also it was early morning so it wasn’t as busy as it will get as the day goes on. I decided that I needed to rescue the duck because a few years ago Bug and I watched a mama duck and her babies get stuck in traffic and much to our horror, one little duckling didn’t make it.  While we screamed helplessly in the car, it was crushed under a wheel right in front of us. We’ve been traumatized about ducks ever since.

    I decided to slowly walk my dogs out into the middle of the street to hopefully scare the duck to the other side to safety. Unfortunately, the dogs interpreted my actions to be that we were hunting the duck and not rescuing the duck so of course they got very excited. The closer we got the more excited they got and suddenly Cody lurched forward, pulling me down with him.

    The dogs got loose and ran after the duck. 

    I fell to the ground on my knees first, then my palm and then my forehead and nose, like a rolling tripod. Now my dogs were running free in traffic, leashes flailing behind them. It was the most horrible thing ever. I got up and ran after my dogs and managed to get them. A car slowed down to see if I was okay but since I was up and running they sped on by.

    I managed to catch my dogs and hobbled home. No broken bones, just skinned up knees, an egg on my forehead (that hides under my bangs) and a scraped up nose. I think the effects of adrenaline got the best of me by then. I teared up but made it home and patched myself up.

    Now I’m walking around with a large surface gash on my nose and my knees are giant healing scabs. I try not to complain but I think I complain all day. Face-planting onto asphalt is hard when you are almost fifty! My whole upper body was sore all week and I’m still creaking around like I’m 100 years old. Anyway, I thought I’d share since photos of me have been popping up looking a little worse for wear.

    I am fine though!

    Moral of the story: Don’t rescue ducks. We’ve walked that same route everyday for a year and every day since the great duck rescue, the duck has showed up near the scene of the face-plant, completely unharmed and apparently not needing rescue. I think he must have a brood nearby or something.

  • 15 minute posts,  Bug,  crazy stuff,  Funny Fashion,  gardening,  rando bits,  the dogs,  The Zoo

    Let’s Catch Up

    I took a minute off blogging. Not on purpose. At this point it’s the monthly illustrating-a-new-banner habit and boy did I work hard on this one. Why? I don’t know! It’s just a thing I have to do. Have you guys watched The Social Dilemma on Netflix? I’m sure you have. It’s pretty good. It gave me a lot to think about so maybe blogging is my small way of sending good content out into the world to fight the evil monster algorithm. It’s pretty scary when you think about it. But it has helped me to put social media and the internet in perspective.

    halloween-in-full-session

    Nobody is happier that it is Halloween Season than Bug. Just when I thought I figured out her last aesthetic (dreamy white walls with delicate botanical drawings, plants everywhere, natural textures and boho hippie vibes…) she goes and changes it! Now she’s really into dark gothic designs and loving anything Victorian. If it’s complicated and patterned and dark then she loves it! But she’s always been this way. When she’s into something she’s passionate about it!

    I guess we are two of a kind that way. The other day we found a new taco stand and they had these wild blue turquoise painted stucco walls. So we posed in front of them of course.

    go-go-bucket-hat

    I recently purchased a turquoise bucket hat so it was kismet.

    new-taco-stand

    This is the taco joint we found. I recently hired an accountant to help me figure out my mess of finances now that I’m a big fat corporation (not) and I have a feeling that the accountant is going to put the kibosh on all these out-to-lunch adventures Bug and I often go on. I think it’s going to be time to get back to basics with peanut butter and jelly soon.

    first-day-of-school-covid-style-hybrid-model

    The girls are back to school two days a week on the hybrid model. They love it. I’m so so. But I do feel a lot better knowing they are back at school only half the time with half the amount of students. It’s a numbers game I guess and at this point I’m weighing their mental health against their chances to catch covid. I guess we’ll just wait and see and take all precautions.

    Back to school for my girls means dressing like you are in the nineties. And by nineties I mean the Kirk Cobain era, not the fact that it has been over ninety degrees outside. I don’t know how they can wear long sleeves and docs when it’s sweltering but they do. Sweat in the name of vanity I guess.

    And speaking of vanity,

    brick-wall-meeting

    Guess who likes her picture taken again! I am so happy to accommodate with the fashion photography. Work it girl! I do love her fashionable choices. She’s getting more and more inventive every day and I love it.

    october-skirt

    The other day we popped into a thrift store and she found this vintage Parisian skirt. I would have never picked it up myself but now that’s she’s been wearing it regularly, I am loving it too! It’s really well made with one tiny button at the waist. I think it’s super cute on her.

    payam-climbs-lassen

    In other news, Payam made it back from hiking Mt. Lassen!  We are so proud of him. He set out to do something that seemed impossible and he did it! Now I just want to go back and do it with him!

    amazing-cactus

    Meanwhile back home my favorite cactus has been putting on a show.

    spreckles-in-a-lampshade

    Oh! I’m babysitting my mom’s dog, Spreckles. This dog. She is going to be the death of me. She’s wearing a cone because she scratched her eyelid and wouldn’t stop itching it until it was raw and hairless. I took her to the vet and they gave her some meds and she’s pretty much better now.

    And she bit my friend Lubna.

    Yes, I said that right. Lubna is fine but it was a scare and a half.  Spreckles has a biting problem and we forget about it because she is a super sweet dog when she’s not a rabid crazy biting dog. It causes us a LOT of stress. She’s a Kingsland Healer so she has instinct to herd animals (or people) by nipping at them. When she gets scared (like if someone unintentionally gets in her space) and will lunge at them. Usually, we can avert this problem by giving her her beloved tennis ball (she’s psycho about the ball) but if we don’t have a ball when she encounters someone new it can get really dicey. She probably feeds off my fear and gets even more defensive and protective of me. Anyway it’s been a super nightmare because I am scared to death she’ll bite someone and really hurt them and then they will sue me and my life will be over.

    I’m being dramatic but it was really scary. She bit our cleaning lady once when she went outside to throw out some trash AND she tried to bite the gardener through our screen door and knocked the screen door out of it’s track. Thankfully I had her muzzle on and nobody was hurt but still. Scary dog!!!!

    Except that she is super sweet to me and nuzzles her little nose into my lap while I’m typing this. How can you put down a dog like that? It is a real conundrum.

    spreckles-muzzle-maria-walking-partner

    I found a muzzle for her that is super cool. She doesn’t mind it either. In fact, she is really happy to put it on usually because I always put it on when we take walks and she’s associated it with getting to go out on a walk. You can see how red her eye was. It’s better now. The muzzle is soft and mesh and she can easily breath with it on. It also doesn’t look too scary like a dungeon dog or something

    Taking walks with all three dogs is the regular three-ring circus it has always been. Except I think it’s worse now that I am afraid of her biting someone. I’m also worried my dogs are picking up on her habits because now Whiskey growls and lunges too but he hasn’t bitten yet. SO enter one of my favorite friends, Maria!! I love Maria for so many reasons but recently she has started walking the dogs early in the morning with me and it helps a ton to have some extra hands.

    3-ring-dog-circus

    So yeah. A real dog circus. Have I mentioned that Spreckles is obsessed with her ball? She was trying to get it from under the couch (where it always seems to go) and she pawed at the cord of our lamp and knocked it over and busted the lampshade. Dogs, man.

    I think that about catches you up. See you next month! Unless I get back here sooner.