Bad Mom,  the great illness of 06,  the sticks

back from the dead… maybe

I’m back. I don’t even know where to start without sounding like an old person in a retirement home. I don’t want to ramble on about my many ailments but that’s what’s been going on. I got sick. Really really sick and now I seem to have the mystery illness that thankfully I finally saw a proper doctor about today. As opposed to an ER doctor (Ugh. The ER. That was like the nine circles of Dante’s Inferno. Should I even bother blogging about that?) Hopefully by next Wednesday we’ll have a real diagnosis or I’ll magically be better. Magically better would be great.

Right now I’m feeling pretty good. But I said that yesterday and ended up spitting out all my words into the toilet. I hate puking. Hate it hate it hate it. I’ve been doing a lot of it. I would say that I could declare this year “the year of the puke”. As I never used to puke. But then I got pregnant and had morning sickness. That was a joy. Then I went on a boat and got sea sick. Joy joy. Then I got this mystery illness and it’s been a triple threat of joydom.

I have some theories about what might be wrong with me. I caught the cold. The giant sinus-snauctopus. Then I was doing a lot of freelance work at night and drinking coffee after nine-o-clock at night, which I never do. I think between trying to be the super mom with the new master chore list in the day time and the freelance designer at night I forgot to drink enough water. Like maybe I forgot to drink water for a whole day or maybe two. I’m a nursing mother, a really really stupid one. I was sick with a cold and then I got dehydrated and then Then THEN I decided to have “new recipe night” and I fixed something strange and foreign and I think I gave myself food poisoning.

I think it was all just too much for my body and my body went on strike. Or I could have stomach cancer. Not really. I shouldn’t kid. Stomach cancer is a very real illness that I’m sure lots of good people suffer from. I don’t think I have stomach cancer. I just think it in my crazy imagination sometimes. Anybody who knows me, knows how my crazy imagination works.

So anyway… I’m back from the sticks. (That’s where I’ve been since Sunday… sans laptop and phone). My mom brought me home today and I saw a proper doctor. My new is doctor really nice and smart as a whip. I think she’ll get to the bottom of it. She ruled out a lot of things we thought it might be, like kidney failure or appendicitis or some kind of bowl blockage… She thinks it’s most likely a virus gone terribly wrong. Possibly something wrong with my gallbladder, possibly kidney stones, possibly a pulled stomach muscle or possibly an infection but most likely it’s just a really really bad virus. I have an abdomen ultrasound next Wednesday. She’s being very thorough.

How’s Baby Bug you’re wondering? Fine. She’s such a little scrap. She didn’t get sick a bit. (Thank you Lord! I think I would have lost my mind if we were both sick and my mind was very close to being lost already.) In fact I think she doubled her healthiness and added a whole extra dose of wiggliness to her repertoire of tricks. She is just non-stop activity these days. In the first days I was sick I just lay on the floor and let her crawl all over me. It was all I could do. I couldn’t even think straight. That’s why my mom had to come rescue me. Toby keeps talking about us moving up north and I really really want to move but the thought of being away from my safety net of family makes me very afraid. I would be lost without my family.

For the first time ever Baby Bug had to be taken care of by somebody else besides me. Grandma rocked her to sleep every night. When she woke up crying in the night, her Auntie CC got up and put her in bed with her. Auntie CC also fed her baby food and dressed her and changed her and pretty much played “Mom” when she wasn’t working. Baby Bug went out to dinner with my family and learned to love to eat Mexican food (while I stayed home groaning on the couch or puking). Her cousins played with her in the daytime. Uncle Chaos used his vulcan mind meld on her and put her to sleep for her nap times. My brother is amazing with babies. All he does is pick them up in his great big burly arms and they magically fall asleep. Every time. He was a lifesaver. They all were. I didn’t mention my Dad because he has a new job and is gone all day long but I can’t leave him out. There’s something about my Dad that just makes me feel better. Maybe because he just worries about me so much. He called to check on me daily from his job. At night after everyone was asleep he came to check on me and told me how worried he was. I love my Dad. I love them all.

But you already know that.


  • Bethany

    so sorry you’re miserable, thanks for the update! I was beginning to worry and then checked camp chaos … it sounds horrible! hang in there and thanks for the reminder to drink more … i always forget and then wonder why i have stomach pains. chore lists be #$%#. for now at least! it’s so easy to push yourself too hard as a mom. hugs to you.

  • Daisy Mae

    You poor thing, I hope you truly are on the mend and are back to normal soon. don’t overdo. What would we do without family, especially Grandma’s? Take care!

  • margalit

    Wow, I’m so sorry that your feeling so sick. It’s horrible to be sick with an active baby around. You have to be alert when all you want to do is lay in bed, close your eyes, and sleep away the month. You’re so lucky to have such a nice and helpful family. I would never move away from people who loved me so, and loved my baby and really wanted to help. What a gift you have.

  • Beck's Mom

    Last spring’s flu bug had my brother’s medical team suspecting several things – from parasite abscesses (over the years he’s spent lots of time in South America) to hepatitis and beyond! In his case, the virus ‘decided’ to concentrate in/attack his liver. We’re indeed thankful that he’s better. Trust your bug will soon disappear!

  • Aunt Doreen

    So sorry you’ve been so sick! I do feel for you. It’s the pits being ill especially with a youngster to take care of. I remember when my two kids were very young and I got sick, there wasn’t anyone else to take care of them except their daddy (undle Tim). And that was when he got home from work. You are very fortunate to have your parents, and other family members that live near you. I wish so much that Becky lived closer to us. Anyway, you take care of yourself, Brenda. We love you up here in Eureka, too! And, don’t forget to drink plenty of water during the day.

  • Jan

    I think everybody who has an idea of what stomach cancer is about has the idea of having it sometimes. If iit gets too often, get it checked up! Nice to read about you getting better. Get well and don’t move up north…that won’t help your stomach…

  • Jamie

    Oh my gosh…you poor thing. I am glad you finally saw a doctor and that she is being very thorough. Take care of yourself. Drinks LOTS of water/gatorade/juice etc.

    p.s. I think you could rent your brother out as a baby whisperer or something ;)

  • Gramma

    I do hope you are mending quickly. I called and talked with CC yesterday, just to tell you about the 30% off sale on Fiesta pottery/china at Gottshalks. I’m happy to be able to read your blog again.

  • Jennifer

    I’m so sorry to hear how ill you’ve been. I had food poisoning before and it took me a good 2 weeks to feel somewhat normal again. Thank goodness you have such a loving and supportive family. I couldn’t imagine being that ill and taking care of a baby.

  • Lucia

    You’ve really been through the mill! You poor thing. I’m so glad your little babe didn’t get ill too. I hope you feel yourself improving every minute. Sending hugs. xxx

  • aunt kathy

    I’m so sorry you were/are sick. I didn’t realize how bad it was, though. Get better quick and like all the other posters say, “Drink lots of caffeine-free fluids.” Take care.

  • BeachMama

    Wow, you really have it bad. Would it be such a bad thing to wish you were maybe pregnant again and not have a virus?? Your symptoms sound awfully familiar. Glad you had your family around to help you out, I don’t know what I would have done this past summer without mine.