Bug,  Family Matters,  Life Lessons,  painting

We found Green Bear

Green Bear

We lost Green Bear for a whole week and then we found him again. It was terrible. I was having visions of him left at the laundromat and adopted by some other kid who wouldn’t love him as much or worse that he somehow fell out of our car and was in a gutter getting rained on. I didn’t know I cared so much about Bug’s old bear. She’s never been one to have a favorite thing. No lovey or blanket that she carries around exclusively but she has loved this bear more than the other 399 stuffed animals she has.

At first she was so mature about it all, telling me that he’d show up eventually and that she was okay without him. She had Valentine Bear and Madeline and then she rambled on a bunch of other names of other stuffed animals that she loved. But then last night it was late and she was tired and when we talked about Green Bear again and went over all the places that he could be, she started tearing up and was inconsolable about him. I started thinking I didn’t care how broke we are right now. I better find another bear exactly like this one on ebay somewhere and hope it’s not a collector’s item.

I lay in the dark fretting about him for a long time. I even prayed. Then about midnight I got up and snuck out of the house in my pajamas to go look in the car one more time. I was cursing myself for all the times I let her take him with us on errands. That bear should stay in the house and never go out. Why am I such a softie about things like this?!!

He wasn’t in the car. I came back in the house, went back to bed and lay in the dark trying to put it out of my mind. Then I looked over at Bug’s dollhouse and there under the table I saw something. I reached under the dollhouse and there was Green Bear. He’d been inches from me all this time. How many nights had I laid down next to Bug and talked to her about Green bear and fretted about him and he was right there next to me?!!!

I don’t know. I know it’s just a stuffed bear and I shouldn’t get all mushy about material things but I hugged that bear with all my might. I felt like I was four again, loving some soft stuffed thing. Maybe I should have prayed about it sooner.

25 Comments

  • JenniferW

    Aw, now you made me go and tear up over a little green bear. I can imagine how heart broken I would be to see my own little beauty heart broken over a beloved lost friend. So glad you found him; better late than never.

  • Leesa

    glad you found bear, did you snuggle him in bed with Bug so she would wake up with him in the morning?
    BTW do you two still have tea parties with your “wee little tea set”? It’s such a cute set- and your photos of it were my first contact with your blog- I was coveting buying one and looking at prices online and your photos of it were better than anyone who was selling it! I never did buy it though (hard to justify when your only daughter is 14)

  • Amber

    You should read Knuffle Bunny if you haven’t already. You’re Laundromat comment made me think of it. My daughter once had to have her beloved Mr. Spots fedexed over night from and aunts house, so we know all about missing a very loved softie!

  • Sam

    Whew. So glad you found Green Bear! I will be glad to keep my eyes out for another one, you know how they have Beanie Babies in antique stores, etc. I am lucky in that Thomas doesn’t really have a beloved stuffed animal (though he does like his humungeous stuffed train pillow).

  • s

    My daughter bonded with a stuffed lion that we got at a zoo. After a year of seeing this absolute bond, I thought to myself maybe I should find another one just in case, but then wouldn’t she KNOW it was different than her beloved lion – not as well worn? Well, 6 years later, she is still attached to this lion even beyond the age most kids let their stuffed animals go. She hasn’t (for years) taken him with us except for overnights – I was able to convince her within that first year that he enjoyed waiting for her on her pillow vs being stuck in the car, so we don’t really have the getting lost issue anymore, but he continues to grow more threadbare – I dread the day he disintegrates! I no longer even wash him – I used to throw him into a pillowcase and put him through the gentle cycle, but I’m too worried he’d fall apart. sigh…I hope he stays in one piece for as long as she needs him in her bed! Glad you found green bear!

  • rachel

    When I was 9, I had a pound puppy that had a little heart on his side – a spotty dog, and I loved him. I lost him. I thought it was at the grocery store, and my mother called, and we couldn’t find him, and I cried and cried. I hated losing things. My mother did too. We were upset. There was blame and sadness and it was a strange thing.
    And then, a few months later, my brother and I were playing with a rarely played with tranformer or something, a carrying case, and as we opened it, out popped the pound puppy.
    At nine, I thought it was a miracle and sign – my life would be okay, because the world would not be so cruel as to take my pound puppy forever.
    I think very early in my life I learned to let to let go, and I forced myself not to let loss stagger me, the way it did my mother.
    I haven’t thought of this since then, probably. Wow. Good post.

  • Donna

    My daughter still has her Pooh bear….she’s 21! He’s with her at school. BTW, I love your water color of Green Bear…so cute!

  • Madge

    Thank Goodness!!! Clarabelle had “elephant” FOREVER. It was a tiny little figurine of the elephant from the Island of Misfits. I can’t tell you how many times we lost him. Each time was tragic. I’ve learned to make sure the kids attach themselves to larger, easier to find objects, ha!

    I know what you mean about that stay at home rule, but it’s so hard to say NO when you just want to get out the door. Open that little bugger up and put a tracking device in him!

  • SuzRocks

    I still have my Koala bear. And I’m 28! Granted he’s sitting up lonely in a closet somewhere, but I still have him- and you’d have to pry him out of my cold, dead hands before I’d voluntarily throw him out.

  • Kuky

    Isabelle doesn’t have a lovey either. But if she did I would get a back up. I have a friend who used to work in a toy store. She would tell me stories about parents coming in trying to find a replacement of a much loved doll.

    I wonder if Isabelle will have favorites when she gets older. I know I went through three favorite dolls when I was little. In fact, I still have all three of them and I’m 37! One of them is sitting on the fireplace mantel right now. :-D.

  • Gramma

    At Cameron’s on Saturday we ordered a Peter Rabbit series
    (5 books) to take to Canada for Dolly, PC, Emma and Butler. At the same time I ordered the Velveteen Rabbit. Maybe Bug would like to read with me the next time you amble out to the sticks?

    Your Mom is most anxious about her last visit to her primary care physician. Monday will tell her some good news, I hope!

  • Kassi

    this is very sweet. I remember being that way with my stuffed toys. now I am that way with my children. of course, I haven’t lost any of my kids under a dollhouse – thank goodness!

  • madamebutterfly

    my daugther had a stuffed mouse called Sally – Sally got left at an airport lounge (I had to run back as we were heading out on the tarmac, a restaurant, and at sevral different friends houses over the years – my daughter is now 23 and Sally came with us on our last move two months ago!

  • bethany

    so glad! and me too about the prayer thing, meh. douglas had ‘green bear’ too, which def. was a lovey and utterly necessary. i ordered a backup once i realized it, and one got lost in the ecuadorian jungle, and the other left at a rest area in NJ. thankfully he was at the point when he was just ready to let it go!

  • Erin

    That looks like the Beanie Baby Erin Bear. I have a small version if you ever get in a pickle again.

  • BeachMama

    I love when that happens. The thing you treasure and thought was lost is beside you all the while. Even better when you stop and pray and you are shown just where it is.

    We lost a baby blanket, the one that cuddled my two babies and was not only a favorite of mine but theirs too. When it was hot it was cool enough to cuddle with, when it was cool it kept them warm. Hubby dropped it out of the car at the Outlets in Delaware, we were halfway home before we realized it was gone. Sometimes I still see that sweet little blanket lying there in the parking lot. Hoping someone picked it up and gave it a loving home.

  • Sharna

    my daughter lost a stuffed puppy when she was little…. She wasn’t especially said but I was devastated. It was the first thing I ever bought for her before she was born and was the first toy she ever had…. I was soooo sooo sad. Then one day, some two years later, we were at our tiny local library. On oneof the free standing buletin boards was stradled what I was sure was my girl’s long lost puppy. But how could it be? Two years later? I went to the desk and asked and they said it had been in the lost and found box for a loooooooooooooong time and they thought they’d put it on view finally to see if someone claimed him….. They were going to give it a few days and then donate him at last. What a happy day that was!! Now in her memory box next to her first hat and first shoes is her lost and found first puppy. I’m so glad you found your green bear!!!

  • Jane

    This brings back memories of my childhood. I had a “blankie” which I took everywhere. I had had it in the crib with me at birth and I was five years old when my mother suddenly took a great interest in it’s cleanliness. About twice a week she would wash it and every time it came out of the dryer it was half as big as when it went in. Soon it was the size of a postage stamp and was hard to keep track of. I eventually gave up on the blankie because, as I explained to my mother, “There was not enough left to love”. When my mother passed away I found a shoe box in her closet and inside were all the pieces of my blankie that she had cut it in half every time she washed it. I am in my 50’s now but still remember the shrinking blanket like it was yesterday.