Some honesty

night light

I have to admit this book tour has been kicking my butt. It doesn’t seem like I’m doing much. Just throwing up a graphic every weekday and then resting on my accolades but I don’t know…I’m not really doing so great at it. I got my schedule all mixed up. I missed emailing some key players, I’ve been getting people the secret sentences at the very last minute and sometimes even hours after that. I’ve been dropping the ball, regularly. Work, books, life…everywhere. I was even late to pick up Bug from kindergarten today and I had promised myself I would NEVER do that.

You should see my desk right now. It’s a complete mess. Maybe I’ll take a picture tomorrow when it’s daylight because I probably won’t have it cleaned up by then. That’s the way the days have been going. But in a way, I’m thankful. I prayed for work and I got it. I’m not rolling in paychecks but I’m making ends meet and I’m busy. It’s a lot to be thankful for.

Winter has been hard on my sense of optimism as I’m sure it has on yours too. The days are so short! It feels like it’s eight when it’s FOUR! How are we ever supposed to get anything done? Well. At 3am of course. That’s why I drink coffee.

But coffee is killing me.

the darling and the hot mess

I tried to take some Christmas photos for a card that I was going to print up this week and mail out next but I couldn’t get a single shot of Bug and me where I didn’t look like a hot mess. Of course she is darling in every single shot but I look like I’m old and drunk with bloodshot eyes that even photoshop can’t fix. I know I could just put a photo of her on the card and call it a day but I vowed to embrace getting older. I don’t want to hide from my wrinkles and gray hairs. Women can be beautiful at any age, I’ve always thought.

I'm so tired

I just didn’t know I would look so scary at 39!!

this is the only one I like
(I like this one the best.)

So I gave up after a while and vowed to drink a lot of water, drink less coffee and get more sleep. You can see how well that’s working for me. I’m typing this at 2:58 am.

autographing

Anyway! The book tour is chugging along. I am so grateful for all my friends and co-bloggers who are saying such nice things about my books. I really don’t deserve it or them. And before you correct me and say that all my hard work is paying off let me correct you and say that my work is nothing in comparison to how kind my friends (and family!) have been to me lately.

They’ve picked me up when I’ve been crying. They’ve given me attitude adjustments when I felt like a failure. They’ve pushed me when I just wanted to give up. They’ve watched Bug for me when I had deadlines. They’ve let me stay at their houses when I had nowhere to go…They’ve nodded when I didn’t have the words. They’ve fed me and Bug when we were hungry. They’ve told me that it’s been a hard year and it’s okay to feel like this. Sometimes I guess I need to hear that because I keep wondering why I’m not doing better than I am.

olives make a thing go right

The autographing party went off smashingly! I didn’t actually autograph any books though. Funny how that happens. You set a date, you get everything ready and then you get in a room with your good friend, good food, a glass of wine and next thing you know you are spending the night talking instead of working.

my publisher

This is Calee, my publisher, friend, book-maker extraordinaire.

dinner

She made soup. That’s kind of awesome, isn’t it? I thought I would order a pizza but she said she had some vegetables that had needed “souping”. How funny is she? Vegetables that needed souping. I wasn’t going to say no to that. If vegetables gotta be souped, they gotta be souped! She saved me $20 and got me to be healthy at the same time. It was quite tasty. I wish I had the urge to soup vegetables now and then. I might have to work on that.

OLIVES!

Bug was a little disappointed at the soup instead of pizza (and potato soup at that, the crime of it!!) but it was nothing a few thousand olives couldn’t fix.

books

Besides all the soup-eating, olive-eating and merry-making, we did get a lot of things organized and the kids had a blast painting.

maybe we should move the books a little further away from the craft projects xoxo

craft projects

A little too close to the books for my liking but thankfully no books were marred! A few paypal invoices might have taken one for the team but what can I say? It kept the kids busy and happy and out of our hair!

bookplates

Today I actually did autograph all the books and I sent them off as promised (yay!). Bug worked very hard at hers. I love that a few readers requested her signature.

autographing

She takes it very seriously, adding flowers and hearts and clouds. She is an eternal bright spot. Talk about God knowing what you need when you need it….

coffee monkey

Did you know she makes me coffee? She might be a bit of an enabler but who could say no to that face and a cup of hot steaming coffee with just the right amount of cream and sugar? Not me!!

opera on the counter

You should see her holding the cup with a towel so it doesn’t burn her and walking so slowly to my desk so that she doesn’t spill. My heart explodes every time.

Rainy Day Pumpkin Patch

pumpkins

I went on a field trip with Bug’s class today to the pumpkin patch. It was really fun outside of the five thousand times I stuck my foot in my mouth with the other parents. I don’t know what my problem was. Nothing too terribly serious but I did wish I would just not ever talk again.

smug bug

Thankfully, Bug is still young enough not to be embarrassed by me. That time clock is ticking though.

feeding the goats here goatie

She loved feeding the goats. They were so cute. Until a big one put his front legs up on Bug and knocked her over. That wasn’t so cute.

baaaah

Baaaaaah nanny nanny.

just right squah boa

They had some pretty great pumpkins. Of course we didn’t make it out of there without buying two. We are having a fall party this coming Monday after all. We have to decorate!

corn maze

I think my favorite part was the corn maze. After waffling quite a bit, Bug decided to stay with me instead of riding the bus back to school so we got to stay and do a few more things that her class didn’t. Like the corn maze. I have to admit I’ve been in a bit of a funk (book tour jitters? gloomy weather? pms? probably all of the above) and it was nice to just spend time with my girl.

this way? that way?

I don’t think any other kid is as patient as she is. So many times I get frustrated with her because she won’t keep up with me but the flip-side of that slowness is that she is perfectly content to walk a corn maze with me for 45 minutes. Any other kid would be whining and complaining of boredom. Not Bug. We walked and walked and walked. We did the whole thing twice and then left, perfectly content that we had seen everything there was to see.

yellow