15 minute posts,  I'm an idiot,  illos,  Life Lessons,  the dogs

The Great Duck Rescue Face-plant

Monday, I was walking my dogs and there was a malard duck in the middle of the street. It’s a pretty busy street so I was worried about the duck. But also it was early morning so it wasn’t as busy as it will get as the day goes on. I decided that I needed to rescue the duck because a few years ago Bug and I watched a mama duck and her babies get stuck in traffic and much to our horror, one little duckling didn’t make it.  While we screamed helplessly in the car, it was crushed under a wheel right in front of us. We’ve been traumatized about ducks ever since.

I decided to slowly walk my dogs out into the middle of the street to hopefully scare the duck to the other side to safety. Unfortunately, the dogs interpreted my actions to be that we were hunting the duck and not rescuing the duck so of course they got very excited. The closer we got the more excited they got and suddenly Cody lurched forward, pulling me down with him.

The dogs got loose and ran after the duck. 

I fell to the ground on my knees first, then my palm and then my forehead and nose, like a rolling tripod. Now my dogs were running free in traffic, leashes flailing behind them. It was the most horrible thing ever. I got up and ran after my dogs and managed to get them. A car slowed down to see if I was okay but since I was up and running they sped on by.

I managed to catch my dogs and hobbled home. No broken bones, just skinned up knees, an egg on my forehead (that hides under my bangs) and a scraped up nose. I think the effects of adrenaline got the best of me by then. I teared up but made it home and patched myself up.

Now I’m walking around with a large surface gash on my nose and my knees are giant healing scabs. I try not to complain but I think I complain all day. Face-planting onto asphalt is hard when you are almost fifty! My whole upper body was sore all week and I’m still creaking around like I’m 100 years old. Anyway, I thought I’d share since photos of me have been popping up looking a little worse for wear.

I am fine though!

Moral of the story: Don’t rescue ducks. We’ve walked that same route everyday for a year and every day since the great duck rescue, the duck has showed up near the scene of the face-plant, completely unharmed and apparently not needing rescue. I think he must have a brood nearby or something.

4 Comments

  • Tina M

    I was coming back from the mail box and reading something we got in the mail, tripped and with mail in my hands, couldn’t catch myself. I LITERALLY face planted and busted up my lip & the area under the nose so bad. And it looked so gross, but was too big to cover with bandages (and how to bandage a lip on top of it). I felt so dumb. At least you were doing a noble deed, trying to save a duck! Not just a clutz.

  • Pat

    OMG! So THIS is the full story! I didn’t want to be rude and ask. About your abrasions. I love that you are/were the duck angel. That would be me. Amazing. Love your artwork.. Brings a smile to events that caused you great pain.

  • Gingermog

    Sorry to hear you had a face plant due to trying to rescue a duck. Brought to mind the time (Indy the dog) jumped into a river after a duck, pulling my mother in law with her, who was holding the leash. She ended up to her knees in muddy water but was thankfully ok and was a great sport about it.

    Love the illos!

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