Just the Right Fit
Today as I was running around madly trying to get a few print jobs off my desk and onto the printer’s so they can all wrap up neatly before I leave for Paris, I realized how blessed I am to be perfectly busy. I don’t want to jinx myself but I somehow have fallen into the perfect work load. Not too much, not too little. Just enough to get my adrenaline running and my creative juices perking at their highest octane level. Yet not enough to make me crazy and bad tempered, which does happen with me when I try to do too much.
Of course I could do a lot more. I have projects upon projects stacked up in my head, favors I’ve promised to friends and family and dreaded new software I should force myself to learn. There are classes I could take, letters I could write, linen closets that could use some re-folding and reorganizing. I have nieces who miss me who would love a mixed music cd or even a phone call. And of course I could always step up the old exercise routine. There is so much to do and yet… it’s okay not to do it all. As Bethany says, “take things off of my to-do list … without doing them!” What a concept.
This happy thought of security came to me today as I was watering my garden with my big iced tea pitcher. (I never have gotten around to buying a real watering can.) I love the feeling of drips of water falling on my toes. It reminds me of being a kid in summer and playing in the hose. It took me a full hour to water every single one of my potted plants. I don’t have the most efficient method. I have to fill up my watering pitcher from around the side of the house and carry it back and forth, back and forth to each and every pot. Each pot takes about a pitcher’s worth of water and I probably have 20 or 30 pots. And then of course I spend a lot of time pulling all the dead leaves off and doing green thumb things like that.
In my old life, when I was ms-corporate-career-woman, this would have frustrated me and sent me running to a gardening catalog for some long winding hose. But now in my new life, the longer it takes the more pleasant it is. I love being outside. I love the zen of the process. I love tinkering around in the area that is the back of our house. Sometimes my neighbors walk by and chat with me. When I’m back there, I’m not stressing about getting back to my desk and working.
How wonderful is that? When I came in from outside and looked at the clock and realized I had just spent an ENTIRE hour outside during the middle of the day on a WEEKDAY, I had to stop and tell myself it’s okay. It’s okay to spend an hour doing something that makes you happy. I ran over my mental list of work I need to get done and I was relieved that no catastrophes had happened. No deadline was missed, no conference call forgotten. Everything is still under control. Doing something fun didn’t spin me into some other twilight zone of stress like it used to.
So can you all do me a favor and knock on something wooden?