BIG NEWS: The book tour!

Secret Agent Josephine, the book tour

The time has come! I finally finished SAJ Numbers and now I get to schedule a little virtual book tour. You might have thought I was going to come to your town and set up a little table and hand out cupcakes. I wish I was. Bug has perfected her signature and everything. I might do that locally but I’m not big enough to travel quite yet. But it could happen. I just need your help.

What I need right now are 26-30 bloggers who would be willing to host a little book tour for me. Just one post. There will be prizes, crafts and even a secret clue game. It’s going to be fun and don’t worry, I’ll do all the hard work for you. I will have a press release ready that you can just copy and paste blurbs from or you can interview me OR you can host a little craft that I will set up for you with printables!! It will be fun! You’ll be part of a tour with some other big bloggers (I’m calling in favors from all my old-school blogging buddies from way back) so you’ll get a lot of traffic to your site (at least that’s my evil plan anyway) because everyone will have to find the secret clue in each blog post.

Is this a mission you would like to accept? Email me and we’ll set up a date.

Secret Spy Numbers

Numbers will drop November 15th just in time for the Kindle Fire (so you can see it in color!) The other books are already out but don’t buy them or pimp them now because I want everyone to make a big fuss on the 20th so it will get a better chance to rise to the top of the book charts and hopefully stay there if it gets good exposure. This is the strategy.

But between you and me, it’s my next book I’m excited about. The one I haven’t written yet: SAJ goes to Paris. I’m giving myself a year to illustrate it and it’s going to be full scenes instead of just illustrations on white. I’ve got a taste for this book-making business and I’m really excited about it. Maybe you’ll join me?

So much news!

Bug

I keep telling myself I need to get in the habit of writing every day about the little things instead of waiting for big things to happen and then documenting them as if I’m writing a book report on my life. But days slip by as they are wont to do and my great ideas on blogging are in vain. As usual.

So here are the big things:

Bug has a two-wheeler! She inherited SuperChic’s old bike. My mom had it sitting around at her house and a neighbor offered to fix it (flat tire, stripped screws where the training wheels needed to go…it just needed a major tune-up) so my mom paid her neighbor and now we have a new bike that is old but totally cool because I didn’t shell out a buncha bucks at Walmart or somewhere even more expensive.

riding!

Recycling at it’s best! Bug totally loves it and it has not even crossed her mind that I could have bought her a shiny new Hello Kitty bike for only five hundred some bazingas. Rusty princesses for the win! Actually, it’s not that rusty, so don’t worry about Tetanus or anything. I know somebody out there was worried about that. They don’t call me a seasoned blogger for nothing.

helmet head go Bug go!

She’s still a little bit wobbly and scared to death of how the whole bike shifts from left to right when she moves her weight from one training wheel to the other but I have no fear that before long she’ll be whizzing around faster than I can yell at her to slow down. Right now I’m thankful for her fear. Even though we live on the American Dream cul-de-sac, I have nightmares about her getting run over by some crazy moron driving down our street too fast. So we are proceeding with the bike-riding with utmost caution. If she takes all year to learn I’ll be a happy momma. But considering how long she took to learn how to scooter I think she’ll be out of training wheels by next week. Sheesh.

I just wish she’d slow down with this growing-up business!

Did you notice her dark blue corduroy jumper? If you read my post about Bug loving hand-me-downs over on my review blog, you’ll have to chuckle at this outfit. It’s Rapunzel’s from ten years ago. I never expected Bug to like it and I almost tossed it in the goodwill box when I was going through old clothes, except she pulled it out and begged to wear it. Shows you what I know.

You know why Bug likes it? Because she thought the red ladybugs at the bottom were red spotted mushrooms from Mario Brothers Mushroom Kingdom. How does my kid know about that? We don’t have Nintendo. It’s not the 80’s. I guess in today’s world all red spotted mushrooms mean super fun musical games or something. Go figure. And yes, she was a bit disappointed when I pointed out that the red mushrooms had black heads and antennae. But she still wore it anyway.

Next big thing:

kitten time with Gramma

My Grandma turned 85 on Wednesday. EIGHTY-FIVE!!! How is this possible? It’s really true that when you pass thirty time speeds up to warp speed. I hate the fact that I’m being so clichéd* and moaning about it. But it’s true. My Grandma is so full of vim and vigor, I’m not ready for her to be old and frail. She’s taking it gracefully though. If ever there was someone to emulate, it is my Grandma. I want to be just like her when I grow up—which should be in about five minutes by my calculations.

Gramma and kittens

So we went over to her house for dinner because that is all she really wants. Material presents are not important, just spending time with family is what she really enjoys. Good thing too because I am the worst at remembering to buy thoughtful gifts when I am navigating motherhood at warp speed. Actually, I think I was bad at remembering to buy thoughtful gifts even when I was young and bored but that is neither here nor there. The important thing is that we were all together and it was super sweet.

Chico

My Aunt Keren thought Grandma would enjoy some kitten-time so my mom brought over all six kittens that she has right now. She’s babysitting my kittens until they find homes since my carpet is freshly clean and she has wood floors and she has three other kittens from a feral cat who abandoned them in her yard. Isn’t my mom nice? Yes. And I’m really trying hard not to take her for granted. By the way, five of those kittens have good loving homes and now there is only one left! Phew!

Anyway back to Grandma and the kittens. It was so sweet! The little black one curled up on her chest and slept there for a half an hour. It was adorable and I think Grandma enjoyed it but then one of her eyes started turning red and itchy so we removed the kittens and decided Grandma might be allergic to the adorable little fluff-balls. It was fun while it lasted though.

root vegetables

We also had root vegetables, which we all love. Best dinner EVER. It was like old times. We missed you, Aunt Kathy.

Last big thing:

trench coat!

I found a trench coat at Target. You guys thought I already had one didn’t you? Nope, I didn’t. I never have. It doesn’t rain here, what do I need a trench coat for? Streaking? Hah! Like that’s gonna happen. It’s all part of my made-up Secret Agent Josephine character in my head. She doesn’t have a double chin either. Bet you never noticed that. Oh you did? Blarg. Well, she’s my made-up character so I felt inclined to improve her. Them’s the perks of being an illustrator. I can draw myself any way I want to be. Be all that you can be!

Stupidly, I got rid of my knee high black boots a while back because I didn’t like the pointy heel so I will probably be investing in some new boots soon. I’m so glad that pointy-heel-pointy-toe trend is over. But knowing me, by the time I get around to shopping for some again will be back in full force. I hate fashion sometimes.

But who cares about that! How funny is Bug? She’s the best model ever. I hate to exploit her cuteness on this blog but as you can see she steals the show without even trying.

spies

So here we are in our official garb looking so very spyish. It’s almost like we didn’t just throw on some trench coats over our sundresses and pull an impromptu photo shoot in our driveway with the neighbor who actually doesn’t know how to use my camera but did a pretty good job anyway! It’s almost good enough to put in the back of my books as my author shot I think! In fact, I think I will just do that.

Keep calm and spy on, Secret Agents!

* That d is for you, Bethany.