Latte Art is for the Birds

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If you follow me on Instagram (Because instagramming is the new blogging!! Don’t ya know?) you already know that I am on a serious quest to teach myself how to create latte art AND I AM FAILING!!! I am flopping like a dying fish on my counter with eyes bulging out. It’s just pathetic. I feel like I’m back in college trying to pass statistics all over again. I just will not learn. This brain of mine, it doesn’t like numbers. And my latte machine, it doesn’t like making perfect foam.

I’ve watched about a thousand youtube videos and none of them have helped me out. I’m thinking maybe it’s just not possible with a Mr. Coffee Espresso maker. It doesn’t really make that crema, you know, the rich golden stuff that sits on top of espresso when you pull it from one of those big fancy Italian espresso makers that they have in coffee shops? And then half the time I make too much foam or not enough…the milk never really incorporates properly with the foam making that glossy foam that they say makes the best latte art… It’s just a never-ending rabbit hole of possible variables to go wrong. Go ahead and google it. You’ll get enough reading material for the next six months.

BUT you know what? I’m not giving up!!! NO! Because even my flops taste great. So everyday I get to try again. And I take pictures of my flops and name them like Rorschach art and all my instagram friends (oh, won’t you be mine?) chime in. It’s kinda been a fun game.

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Now my latte art is sort of turning into how-can-I-take-a-picture-of-my-latte-with-different-backgrounds to create art since there’s no real art going on in the cup. Maybe it will be the new Gumball and I’ll start taking over the world with my latte flops. You already know how good I am at driving with a coffee cup in one hand. Imagine the possibilities! Can you latte on a stick? Can you latte on a brick? With a fox in a box? Try it, try it, Mr. Knox, sir!